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Online First Meetings

The First Meetings / Dates Rules Of Engagement For Successful Online Dating

Connecting With New People Online: Don’t be in too much of a rush when you first meet your new online dates. Get to know them without being too intrusive. Be as relaxed as possible, keep calm and always trust your instincts, especially those that give you bad feelings. Act with caution and learn more about a potential date - especially if the objective is overtly sexual - before contacting him or her outside of the online dating site. Most reputable online dating services offer mail and chat facilities so you can get to know people in a safe and controlled way before taking the physical plunge. They do it to protect you, and not just to make money. Safe online dating is good for business, after all! Use their communication platform and benefit from the added security it gives. If and when you do decide to share an e-mail address think about creating a separate one that is anonymous.

Take A Reasonable Time Before Meeting:  Sometimes when you are excited about meeting someone new, your instincts can be confused by strong feelings and a need to make a successful physical connwction. Take care and take your time when you talk about yourself. You don’t need to give out your life-story the first time you chat. Wait until that all-important face-to-face encounter. There will be plenty of time to share such details if your relationship develops. Your motto should always be “Slowly, slowly”.

Be Responsible And Do Your Own Research: No matter how hard they try, there is a natural limit to an online dating provider’s ability to properly check the backgrounds of users and verify the photos and personal information they provide. Dating web sites cannot do a criminal records check on every user. Plus, a member can become a stalking, harassment or fraud problem without having a criminal record. Therefore, don't get a false sense of security because you are on a reputable online dating site. Do your own research to learn as much as you can about someone and make informed decisions before you decide to meet. Check to see if the person you are interested in is on other social networking sites like Facebook, do a web search to see if there are other records of the person online, and if possible use Google Image Search to check the profile photos.

Money Requests Are An Un-crossable Red Light:  You are not someone else’s personal charity. Why would a relative stranger need to borrow money off somebody they have never met before, or only just become acquainted with? There is no reason for anyone to ask you for money or your financial information, whatever sad or sob story they give. Always keep your bank and account information private. Even if you have taken someone to your bed tis is no reason to give them access to your bank as well. Stop all physical and online contact immediately and report the matter to the dating site.

Report Unacceptable or Suspicious Behaviour: Nobody should have to put up with offensive, insulting and threatening behaviour online any more than they should or would if talking to someone at work or socially. Trust your instincts and immediately stop communicating with anyone who makes you feel uncomfortable or apprehensive. Never feel embarrassed to report a problem to the online dating service. You are helping them and doing other users a favour.

Be Prepared To Walk: No matter how much you have invested both emotionally and financially in someone you met online, be prepared to cut your losses and walk away if your date turns out not to be Mr or Mrs Right. There are always plenty more prospective matches.

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